Respect in a Relationship Lesson at Life Coach Boot Camp

Visit: https://lifecoachbootcamp.com/relatio... Respect in a Relationship by: George Tannous, PhD Become a Certified Life Coach When most people are asked about the most important element of a healthy relationship, they often say love, affection or give and take. Some also say trust and some also point their fingers at freedom. While all these are essential pillars of a healthy relationship, there is one important pillar that is crucial for a strong foundation. And that pillar is respect. Why? Can you love someone who constantly pushes you around? Can you be with someone who constantly degrades you and tears you apart? Can you form a relationship with someone who doesn’t care about your needs and opinions? The answer is no, right? When people in a relationship lack mutual respect, the relationship starts struggling to survive and love automatically evaporates. For many, respect comes before every pillar of the healthy relationship. When we were young, we were taught to respect our professors, our parents, and elders. We were taught to give respect to authority figures. But when you are in a relationship, nobody is the authority figure. Having respect in a relationship means everyone is equal and the opinions of everyone matter. It means you cherish the similarities and accept the differences. You give others the freedom to be themselves around you without being judgmental or critical. You trust and treat each other well even when at times you disagree with each other. When the cornerstone of a relationship is mutual respect, the relationship thrives. And there are some signs of a healthy relationship that indicate mutual respect. Signs of respect in a relationship They pay attention: Paying attention not just means listening, but it also means you pay attention to each other’s needs, wants, and concerns. In addition to this, you appreciate each other’s presence, and you don’t take each other for granted. Boundaries are respected: When a relationship is constructed on mutual respect, people acknowledge boundaries. They understand that no means no. They respect your privacy and personal space. They don’t push you to do things you don’t want to do, and they understand your perspective and give importance to your comfort. Winning becomes secondary: No two people can be the same. Every relationship comes with differences, and clashes are a part of relationships. But the important part is how these differences are handled. When arguments or disagreement arises, people in relationships that are based on mutual respect find a middle ground instead of striving to win. They keep promises: Ever been in a relationship where things are unpredictable? Where your coworker, your boss, your friend, or your spouse keeps you guessing all the time? Relationships are formed to help people feel safe and secure. But in many cases, people easily flip their words and break promises. Not only this gives rise to confusion but also tarnishes trust. When relationships are formed and respect is the foundation, people keep their promises, and their actions align with their words. But what if a relationship lacks an appropriate amount of respect? What if respect in a relationship is just not enough? Can something be done in this case? The answer is yes. And here are some simple steps which you can cultivate respect in a relationship. Cultivating respect in a relationship The very first step is to have respect for yourself. When it comes to relationships, many people start putting up with things because of several reasons. Sometimes they do it because they feel insecure, sometimes they do it because of fear and sometimes, they just want to be accepted. While it all seems great in the start, people gradually start losing themselves in the relationship. The line between what’s acceptable and what’s unacceptable starts to blur as the tone of the relationship gets set in the initial stage and instead of bringing joy, these relationships bring people sorrow and misery. “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent”. These powerful words were spoken by Eleanor Roosevelt. Having respect for yourself is the very first step to forming healthy relationships where the respect you give to others gets reciprocated. Respecting yourself doesn’t mean thinking highly of yourself or being too proud of yourself. It simply means accepting yourself as who you are. You know you have flaws; you know you are not perfect, but that’s okay. No one can make you feel inferior or bad about yourself. You haven’t given that authority to anyone. It’s important to create and know your own boundaries. You must know what’s acceptable with you and what’s not.